The New Normal York Times

I trained an AI model on 16,000 headlines published on NYTimes.com in 2020 and asked the model to make me some new ones. What came back was a mix of what you might expect from the New York Times in a post-2020 world and what you might not.

Just like a real newspaper, I’ve broken out these headlines into sections. I used this dataset and this GPT-2 notebook to generate the headlines. These are completely un-edited, aside from a handful of apostrophes added to correct grammar.

Politics:

• Which President Is Next?
• Trump Adds to the Panic Hole of the Obama Situationism
• Trump Mocks Coronavirus Fears: “You Nah”
• Iran’s President Vigorously Regards Dr. Fauci
• You Cant Fake Gold, Biden Says
• “In Europe, More Work and Loopholes to Jump on to Airplanes”
• Jazz and a Walk on the Battlefield: Investigating Iranian Nuclear Program
• California Governor Orders All Highway Traffic to Be Flowed Over
• Dick Cheney and the Foundations of American Power
• When All the Pieces Fall Into Place for Mitt Romney
• 10 Reasons You Should Give Trump a Break

Science:

• “We Did the Exact Right Thing, Says Mary Poppins’ Therapist”
• Comparing Yourself to the Great Comet of Nazca
• Mother Sea Turtles Are Taking Flight
• Does Anyone Have a Clue About How to Fight the Coronavirus?
• The 9 Things You Need to Call a Pandemic Ambient
• A Heat Wave Drives Winter Into New England
• The Science Behind Your Child’s Perfect Face
• It Did Not Go So Heated: The Inside Story of a Case Study in Physics
• Rivers Merge in NJ for a Day. No One Is Ignoring Them.
• This Is Wherever the Sick Get Shredded
• How the Healing Time Beginned

Food

• Our Food Page: Meat Is My Paradise
• How to Make One-Pot Pasta With Practically Any Pasta
• How to Make a Cotton Candy Lantern
• How Do I Make Cornmeal Casserole? You’ve Never Heard of It
• You Need a Little Tuna
• “The Rise of Local News, and the Dish That Keeps It Going”
• Cocoon Cocktails
• Virus Cure: You Lose the Boozy Cookbook
• The Most Comforting Dish to Eat Is a Sushi Hut
• Stay-at-Home Restaurants? No Problem

Culture:

• Democrats and Teens: A Playlist’s Journey
• Can You Really Make Friends With People You Don’t Know?
• The Women Who Love Their Children
• “How Michelle Obama’s Motto Is Transformed, Recalls Justin Bieber”
• These Dogs Is for Real
• What Really Happened in 1987?
• Strange Times
• New York City’s Taxi Industry Is Biking Again. Thats a Good Thing.
• How to Actually Talk to a Freeloader
• The Most Comforting Thing About Dancers Is the Noise. The People Who Do Them Feel Mostly Right.
• Our Best Halloween Trick
• “For TikTok’s Forgotten Hero, an American Hero”
• America’s Remorseless War On Life
• Maybe the 50 Best Christmas Songs in 1,000 Days Are All Just Riffs
• When the Odds Are You Go Live and Change the World
• The Reality TV Hosts Turn Out to Be Epic Failures
• The 50 Best TV Shows for Working-Class America
• People Are Giving Away Cash Freely in Alberta

Style:

• The Victoria’s Secret to Long-Haired Business Women
• “Is It Hats? Pendants? …”
• My Adult Daughter Shouldn’t Be Taught Bad Fashion. What Happened?
• The Most Popular Reason for a Gold Mine Owner to Stop Making Gold: He’s Too Young to Make It
• Spotting 94 Carat Gold Dogs on a 1,000 kilometer Trip
• “Yes, People Are Paying for This.”

Opinion:

• How Many People Do I Have? You Probably Don’t Want to Know
• First You Have to Be a Millionaire to Get a Second Birthday
• The Compassionate Mr. Good Will Wins
• Screw This Virus! Sabotage in 10 Days Is Pauseful Then Capture Is Made
• Parents Got a Good Night. The Hospital Got a Bailout.
• The Public Opinion Polls We Need to Permanently Decide About Apple and Google
• The Sickest and Greatest Need in 2020: Clean Air and a Shot at the Top
• Whatever Comes Next
• Google Searches Are Back. Do They Matter Much?
• How to Actually Spend Less Money
• You Are Now Your Last Stand